You’re body vs. the media: learning to love the skin you’re in.
“We live in a visual culture,” says Tammy Laber, a counselor in Toronto who focuses on weight issues. “We see images every day of what people are supposed to look like.” Society has a whole spectrum on what is considered too fat or too skinny. Laber says that this is especially true in the media. Although the “visual culture” is changing and we are starting to accept all different body types, we still seldom see larger women in attractive positions, including the leading roles in movies. “They are not the lead character,” Laber says. “They are not the one that everyone wants to be.” When we see these stereotypes every day, we learn that this is not what we want on a subconscious level, Laber says.
Instead of focusing on how your body looks and where the needle falls on the scale, it’s healthier to focus on how to maintain a healthy body mass. “Part of being healthy and achieving a healthier body is by achieving a healthy, lean body mass or percent body fat,” says Stefanie Senior, a registered dietitian in Toronto. If you want to trim down your weight a little bit, you want to make sure that you are doing it for your health and doing it the right way. “If you lose weight too fast, that could indicate muscle loss,” she says. “Fat loss is when your fat cells shrink and so your weight from fat decreases.”
“I used to weigh myself a lot,” says Marta Wlodarczyk, a University of Guelph student in her 20s . Wlodarczyk has always had a nice, fit frame. She exercises regularly and is an active salsa dancer. Wlodarcyzk says that she stopped weighing herself last year since her health, not her weight, is her main priority. But she admits that sometimes she feels uncomfortable in the clothes that she wears. She tries to remind herself, “It’s probably not what others think, it’s myself [who thinks that],” she says.
And every woman should be proud of her body type. It can be difficult with all of the social expectations out there, but Laber says, “Even a larger person who is confident can say, I’m big and beautiful.” And that’s the kind of outlook you should have to free yourself of “the visual culture.” It starts with the way you see yourself and what you do to build confidence. If you have a low self-esteem, you can be critical of everything.
Having positive feelings toward herself has really helped Wlodarczyk love her body more, she says. Ever since she stopped looking at her weight on the scale, she started feeling more confident. Instead, she focuses on her health by eating healthy and exercising regularly. To reach a healthy weight that’s right for your body type, Senior recommends a combination of strength training, cardio training and flexibility to balance your exercise program.
“It’s important to focus more on losing weight circumference and also getting in better shape,” Senior says. Senior always sets her clients out with realistic expectations by reminding them of the long-term goals and how being healthy is a process. “Everyone is different and everyone has different genetics,” Senior says. Laber follows this same method when she is dealing with a client who may be lacking confidence. “If they are already eating in a healthy way, I try to help them understand that people come in different shapes and different sizes and that many different things are beautiful,” Laber says.
Laber tries to encourage her clients to change their string of negative images to more positive ones. She does this by helping them focus on the things they do like about themselves because people generally exaggerate their flaws.
“Stopping the habit of bringing yourself down is one of the biggest issues,” says Laber. “And it takes a lot of practice to stop doing that.” Laber provides strategies specific to her client’s situation to help them avoid having negative images. What she recommends for her clients is to write goals, read out positive affirmations, and to meditate.
“Potentially people could see me differently,” Wlodarczyk says. “But it doesn’t affect me that much.” Wlodarczyk tries to steer away from living up to society’s expectations. Instead she sees herself in a positive light, and she sees others in the same way as well. “It’s a matter of understanding that none of us are perfect, yet in some ways all of us are,” Laber says.
Fit Fatale 